Saturday, November 27, 2010

New and Improved!

Well HI there my lovelies!  It has been quite a while since I've posted.

Let's see:

1. got married
2. got to have my dad there (he was touch and go for a while but he's great now!)
3. been auditioning
4. been working out like crazy
5. started a new business.

Say what?

Yes.  I am now an Independent Beach Body coach.  A decision I did NOT come to lightly.

I was working at small, boutique gym in the back office.  It was a great part-time job dealing with reports and retention and all that.  But my boss was a bit of an OCD psycho and I just couldn't deal with him anymore.  He, essentially, forced me to quit.  Long story, but it's true!

So, to say the least I was frustrated.  I talked to a friend of mine and she had just signed on to be a coach.  I've been approached by people before.  Never did I want to take the plunge because, well, I just wasn't committed.  Now, with no job and sick of staring at the Craigs List wall, I decided today was the day to just jump in and try it.  If it works, GREAT.  If not.  Oh well, at least I tried.

My friend told me that until the end of the year, to sign up as a coach is, essentially, free.  Well, this clinched it for me.

I'm definitely interested in trying something for free, right?  :)

Also, Beach Body is the company that has P90X!  And those of you who know me, know I did all 3 months of that crazy workout.  THEN I did Insanity.  And now I'm doing ChaLEAN Extreme!

Oh yes, people.  OH. YES.

So I figured I'm working for a company I 100% believe in!  Why not get discounts and freebies and share my experience with other people looking for the same life change I got!  So yeah.  Yay me!

How are you?  Did the Thanksgiving world kick your butt?  It sort of did for me, but I did workout yesterday and today (and plan to tomorrow too!).


Monday, March 8, 2010

Day 103 - Gifts and Saying Goodbye

Thursday, March 4, 2010

So today was a crazy day!  Mom and I met to accomplish a couple of things wedding-wise:

1. check out bridesmaids gifts
2. check out gifts for hostesses giving the shower
3. check out flower girl gifts
4. go to the jeweler to design my wedding band

Before that, I got a call from my agent (YES!) to come in for a voice over audition.  Mom and I walked from her place to Starbuck's where she waited while I went in for my audition.  After it was over, we headed to find some gifts!

We were VERY successful!  Here's how it played out:

1. found shower gifts
2. found bridesmaids gifts (just have 3 more to pick up from another store)
3. found groomsmen gifts
4. found flower girls gifts
5. found me a rehearsal dinner dress
6. found me a shower dress
7. planned a 2nd day with jeweler so Jon could get fitted too

All in all a very successful wedding-planning day!

Our friend Gene is leaving Chicago tomorrow.  We're sad!  Unfortunately he just could NOT find a job while here.  It's been so tough watching so many people struggle with money and being jobless.  He's headed back to Maine to save some money so he can come back to Chicago for our wedding!  I have high hopes for him. He's a great guy!

We had a fun dinner with him and toasted him a good farewell.  We are driving him to his train tomorrow evening.  Sigh.

Calories Consumed: 1241

Workout: NONE

Day 102 - Yay for money and Yay for auditions!

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

So today was a work day at Jon Wolter's office.  I've been trying to temp in between all the craziness I have going on otherwise. I actually LIKE going into work at Jon Wolter's office.  We often barely deal with each other, but everyone is really nice and truly respectful.  It's a good environment to hang out in.  Plus, I think they like me.  I'm certainly their first "go to" person.  That always feels good!

While at work, I got a call from my agent to come in for a voice over audition.  I cleared it with work and off I went for an audition!

I LOVE THIS BUSINESS.  Seriously, it's fantastic getting called in for stuff.  I love the agency.  I'm eager to book something so they decide to keep me on!  I love that I can just jump at a moment's notice into the office, spend 5 minutes there going over the copy, go in and record, and be out of there! It's great!

On the way back, the CTA buses were running sloooowwww!  I finally got back and finished the day up. It was a good day all-around.

No workout today, but I'm thinking I might be getting slightly bored with my routine...may need to switch it up soon!

Calories Consumed: 960

Workout: NONE

Day 101 - Mom's Dress and The Biggest Loser returns

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

So today my mom and I headed up to Highland Park.  I had to meet with Carrie (my sister-in-law) about our business and we also had a few wedding goals to accomplish:

1. solidify the invitations
2. find mom a dress

Invites went GREAT!  Jon and I worked on the response card-wording and are happy with our creative results.  The other stuff looked excellent so we are good to go!

Mom's dress.  Well, as luck would have it, we went back to the same place mom purchased her dress for my last wedding-that-shall-not-be-named. (It never happened.  2 months before it was cancelled!)  Mom LOVED that last dress.  It fit her perfectly.  It was MADE to fit her.  She looked stunning and felt stunning.  She didn't keep the dress (it was in purple) because she didn't want to wear it to anything else. She was really sad to see it go.  Mom also hates to shop so this experience would prove not fantastic to begin with unless we hit it out of the park on our first at bat.

Funny enough, when we were looking for MY dress we went to 5 different places.  I really liked one dress (but I didn't LOVE it) but it was really out of my price range.  I could have talked my father into it, but I really didn't love it.  Then we finally bit the bullet and went to the place where I got my last dress.  I was leery about going back to the same place.  Felt like a bad idea or whatever, but, lo and behold I found THE dress.  I LOVE my dress!  I LOVE MY DRESS.  And I was thrilled we'd decided to look fear in the face and go back there.

Mom took no chances and decided to hit the same place.  And after trying on about 11 dresses with NOTHING that came even close to a possibility, we decided we'd go somewhere else.  Mom got dressed and had a conversation with the sales person about the last dress she had and how much she loved how it fit.  The lady went in the back and pulled out a dress that looked amazing.   Mom tried it on and it was perfect...just a size too small and in the wrong color!  They looked at the swatches of fabric and realized it could be made in the color we needed and made to her measurements!  PERFECT!

Also?  It turns out, THIS dress is made by the same designer as the LAST dress Mom fell in love with!  So it all works out in the end!

So excited to see it on her when it's in the correct color and cut to fit her!  :)

Tonight, THE BIGGEST LOSER Season 9 returned (it's been on hiatus for The Olympics) and I'm so excited!  It's such a motivator to work out when watching that show!

What shows get you moving/motivated?

Calories Consumed: 937

              3 minutes warm up
              45 minutes run/jog
              8 minutes cool down
        Strength Training:
             125 regular crunches
             100 reverse crunches
             1 set Pilates 100
             50 toe reaches (alternating)

Day 100 - Water bottle hazard and The Paper Source

Monday, March 1, 2010

So today Sari and I had rehearsal for the concert.  I got there on time and was waiting for her and her brother-in-law to show up.  She finally texted me to say she'd been in a car accident!

She was rear-ended by a girl whose water bottle rolled under her break pedal and so she couldn't stop!

How scary!  Thankfully everyone was ok.  Sari banged her head but her car was ok.  The other girl's car was pretty banged up.

It was freaky waiting for her to get there.  I just wanted to hug her and know she was alright!

Once the police came and everything got sorted out, we actually did get to rehearse.  It was fun!  We staged the show (choreography and all) and really had a lot of fun with it.  It's going to be an awesome show. :)

Later on, I had to meet my Mom and my recently married cousin, Jamie, at the Paper Source to look at paper for booklets for the wedding.

Umm...I have a small love affair with The Paper Source.  I adore that place.  All these fun crafty projects with lots of creative ideas!  I just wanna spend tons of time in there touching all the pretty cards and ribbon and textures.

So we got what we needed and then headed out to get a coffee at Starbucks.  Mom treated and we had a great talk.  Sometimes I just love those moments where you spontaneously get to spend time with people you wouldn't normally get to spend time with.  It was such a nice 30 minutes.  :)

What are some pleasant/surprise moments you get throughout your day?

Calories Consumed: 927

             3 minutes warm-up
             42 minutes run/kicks/punches
             8 minutes cool down

      Strength Training:
             60 back rows (resistance bands)
             60 pulsed back rows (resistance bands)
             50 biceps (10 lbs each hand)
             50 triceps  (10 lbs each hand)
             50 chest flies  (10 lbs each hand)
             50 shoulder press  (10 lbs each hand)

Friday, March 5, 2010

Day 99 - Rehearsal and Super Sari

Sunday, February 28, 2010

So today I had to go down to the Harold Washington Library and meet up with Sari for rehearsal.  We are rehearsing for a fantastically fun one-night only event to help fundraise money for a synagogue in Evanston, IL.

Sari is amazing!  We met at Roosevelt University and totally "get" each other.  She was my saviour when I lived in NYC for a month and went to auditions with me and we did Bikram yoga together.  She rocks!

Her brother-in-law is a Cantor at this synagogue in Evanston and they are performing an evening of celebration of a famous Cantor named Moyshe Oysher.  No joke.  There is a song he performed with the famous Barry Sisters and they needed another voice for the song.  Sari called me!  I'm so excited to do this fun little project for a good cause.  Or, as we say in the Jewish faith....a Mitzvah. (good deed)

So Sari and I met to run through the harmonies and just get an all-around sense of stuff.  It was a great rehearsal.

I always feel refreshed and happy once I've spent time with Sari.  She truly is a positive force in my life.  When people tell you to surround yourself with positive people, Sari is a perfect example of one of them.

Grateful for my wonderful friends and supporters.  :)

Who supports you in your life?

Calories Consumed: 906

              3 minutes warm-up
              35 minutes run

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Day 95 - Frustrations with Dr's Office and UP

Saturday, February 27, 2010

So today started off not well.  I had an appointment to see my gynecologist for my annual I thought!

I busied myself trying to get in a workout before I was supposed to be there when it dawned on me I'd never gotten a confirmation call.

The appointment was all through communication on the "patient link" online site the doctor's office has set up.  You request an appointment and someone responds and lets you know what is available.

When I called to confirm my appointment this morning the office was, you guessed it, CLOSED.  I went to the patient link and re-checked the appointment date and time and, sure enough, it said I had an appointment TODAY at 12:30pm.

I called back and left a very frustrated message.

I then wrote a response on the patient link saying the same things.  I felt like my time was totally wasted and I scheduled my entire weekend around this appointment.

Suffice it to say I was irritated.

I did get a call back and the office apologized saying it was their mix-up.  The person who responded on the patient link looked in my file and noticed I had an appointment on February 27th at 12:30pm.

In 2009.
Oy vey.

So the rescheduling began.  Fingers crossed this goes well...

Tonight we headed over to my friend, Ellyn's apartment.  We ordered really yummy (and fresh!) thai food and watched Pixar's UP.

I adore this film.  ADORE IT!  Some of the best writing for a dog I've ever heard.  Hilarious.  Adorable. Sad. Just all around awesome.

I highly recommend it if you haven't seen it!

Any films you recommend these days?

Calories Consumed: 1134

            3 minutes warm-up
            12 minutes cardio (run) -- got interrupted by gynecologist office phone call -- then had to leave
      Strength Training:
             100 reverse crunches
             100 regular crunches
             30 push ups
             1 set of Pilates 100

Sunday, February 28, 2010

Day 94 - Superstitions and Weigh-in week #14

Friday, February 26, 2010

So today was the last day of rehearsal for Senior Spotlight.  I'm really looking forward to getting to work with the senior citizens in the residencies.  Apparently we do sing-a-longs and work on their imaginations with theatre games and such.  It sounds like a rewarding experience for us and for them.

The show is really cute and I will miss rehearsing it with everyone.  As an understudy I am not called in for the shows (although I definitely plan to go see one).  I just have to keep up on the script and the music in case someone gets sick and I'm needed.

I also had an audition today...

I don't usually broadcast my auditions like some people.  I'm sure it's superstition or because I don't want to go through the process of explaining it if I don't get the job.  It's like going on constant job interviews.  People don't know what to say to you when you say you didn't get the job.  They feel badly for you but it gets awkward.  It's much easier to mention it later.

THEM:  "Where were you yesterday when I called"?

YOU: "Oh, I was at an audition".

THEM: "Wow!  What for?"

YOU: "For an agent".

THEM: "How did it go?"

YOU: "Pretty good/ok/great/awful (etc)"

THEM: "Oh, well great/you'll get 'em next time/good for you/chin up".

YOU: "Thanks"

This scenario is SO much better for me after the fact than before the fact.  I really have no interest in discussing my auditions.  I psych myself out of them if I talk about them too much.  Afterwards, I'm all about discussing it, even if it didn't go well.  I even have a sense of humor about it sometimes. :)

That being said...

I had an audition on Friday.  For an agency.  A good one in the city.  For my voiceover.

I was really excited (and a bit nervous).  I only told one person I was going in.  C* at Sound Advice (the place I recorded my demo.  THEY ROCK).  I wanted some input on how to audition for voice over for an agent (as opposed to on-camera or theatre).  Thank goodness for C*.  She rocked it!  She gave me great advice and told me to just go in and have a blast.  Which I did.  She also cautioned me not to be discouraged if I wasn't asked to work with them this time around.  Often agents will call you in and then tell you to come back in 6 months.  I was prepared for that.

The great thing was I really did go in and have a great time.  :)

And afterwards, the agent said she'd like to try this out.


Yup.  So, without jinxing anything...looks like I have an agent!

I plan to continue promoting my demo to the creatives (which gets my name out, of course!)

All is happy.

Oh!  I almost forgot about the weigh-in!

Things are going in the right direction.  I'm down another .4 lbs!

Weight loss to date: 9.6 lbs!  WOO HOO!

Go me.  Good day, sunshine!

Calories Consumed: 1240

Workout:  NONE

*This not working out thing is getting to be a really bad habit.  Gotta fix that!

Friday, February 26, 2010

Day 93 - Matters of the Heart and Taxes

Thursday, February 25, 2010

So today was busy but also slightly disorienting.  I've been in rehearsals to understudy for a show called Senior Spotlight for Imagination Theatre.

This work is very rewarding because we take the show to senior resident homes and work with them on imagination, sing-a-longs, etc. It really seems to help the majority of them forget about their "troubles" for a short while.

One of the other things we do is called a residency.  We visit one home 12 times and work one-on-one with a group of seniors.  We do exercises for their memories and their minds.  We do sing-a-longs and encourage them to get a bit active and enjoy things.

I'm looking forward to the work.  I'm just a little nervous.

Anyhow, we have a very short rehearsal schedule but they are beginning shows on Tuesday!  Yikes!  So quick.  With tight harmonies and choreography (oh goodness there go my two left feet again) I just really hope neither of the people I'm understudying gets sick...or a really good paying job...right?

I came home fully expecting to get A LOT of stuff done (including working out), and was very accomplished with my to-do list...however somehow the workout just didn't happen.

I don't like that.

It's imperative that I make time for that.  But I just didn't put my focus in the right places.

I guess the fact that I really wanted to do my taxes and get them DONE was weighing much more heavily on my head.

Lately, I've gotten phone calls/emails/texts from 3 friends who are dealing with matters of the heart.  I want so much to make things easier on them and their sadness/frustrations.   There must be something in the air.

My life-long friend, (and one of my maids of honor-to-be), called last night so upset.  I sat on my bed with my receipts spread out before me and just talked it out with her.  She doesn't live here so it's incredibly hard to give a full emotional hug to someone over the phone but we try.  She needed it.  And deserves it.  I wish I could take her pain away.  I know it will figure itself out.  I just hate it when people I love so dearly are in pain.

Other than that, I gotta find some me/down time.  It's been on-the-go for too long.  I'm getting cranky.

What are some things you do to unwind??

Calories Consumed: 962

Workout: NONE

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Day 92 - My crazy schedule and Avoiding sleep

Tuesday, February 25, 2010

So today was filled with busy-ness.  Heh. business.  Busy-ness.

Yeah.  I'm exhausted.  I've been busting out wedding stuff, film stuff, rehearsal stuff, life stuff...I'm really wiped out!

But I can't sleep.

Well, I can but I'm sort of afraid to go to sleep.

I'm afraid of my dreams.

There. I said it.  I'm afraid of my dreams.

I'm really sick of having dreams about my ex and Jon's ex.  I know that a LOT of it is wedding-related.  I also know that it's my body's way of working stuff out.  I know, even more, that it's much easier for my brain and self to deal with THEM than deal with the other wedding frustration (read: my awful uncle) which I am subjected to dealing with and really don't want to.  That situation is it's own "living nightmare".

I'd prefer to run into either one of our exes.  Twice.  Than deal with my uncle coming to my wedding. But that is a whole other blog story.  One I'll examine as the wedding day approaches and my anxiety explodes.

Yay! Things to look forward to! :)

My friend, Debbie, is having her baby in March and I cannot believe March is around the freaking corner!  Soooo close!

Ok. It's time for me to wrap up and suck it up and go to bed.  I'll be no good for anyone if I don't have sleep.

I have a full list of things to do tomorrow!
TAXES are on that list... let's see if I can hop to it!

Calories Consumed: 982

             3 minutes warm-up
             35 minutes cardio
             (2 - 1 minute sprints; 1 - 5 minute sprint)
              8 minute cool down

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Day 91 - Wedding madness and bad dreams

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

So today my mom and I spent most of the day working on wedding stuff.  I think we finally got our invitations!  We have one more meeting with the vendor and then we are set to go.  This thing is really happening!

My heart hit my feet when they told us the invites need to go out on April 19th.  Ummm, THAT'S LIKE AROUND THE CORNER!  I feel like we've done NOTHING and have SOOOO much left to do before this wedding!


Anyhow, Carrie and I did some work on our home-business and then my mom and I started home from the suburbs.  In traffic.

It wasn't so bad but I was really happy I had worked out this morning!  It made it possible for me to not be so anxious while we were out.  I don't spend the whole day just hoping I'll have enough energy to workout when I get home after whatever is going on.  I love getting it done first thing!

Another reason for invitation anxiety is that at my previous non-wedding, my ex pulled his bullshit right as the invitations were hitting the calligrapher.  We had to literally THROW OUT all our invitations. Today was a reality moment that this thing is really happening. And it's a WONDERFUL thing.  :)

I'm sure all this ramping up to the wedding is helping my incredibly bad dreams I've been having about my ex and Jon's ex.  There's so much history and drama with them.  Jon's ex was supposed to be in my last wedding.  It makes for some bad feelings and ugly situations.  I hate that it manifests itself in my dreams.  My sleep is bad enough as it is, (we need a new mattress and we need new non-meth-addicted neighbors), so these dreams are just making it worse.

I feel like this will subside once we get past the 2 month mark.  Or at least when we are finally married.  Right?  I hope so!

Here's how today played out.

How do you deal with stressful dreams?

Calories Consumed: 1220

             3 minutes warm-up
             33 minutes
             (1 - 5 minute sprint)
             8 minutes cool down

     Strength Training:
            60 back rows (resistance bands)
            60 pulsed back rows (resistance bands)
            60 biceps curls (12 lbs each hand for 10; 10 lbs each hand for 50)
            60 triceps curls (12 lbs each hand for 10; 10 lbs each hand for 50)
            60 shoulder press (12 lbs each hand for 10; 10 lbs each hand for 50)
            60 chest flies (12 lbs each hand for 10; 10 lbs each hand for 50)

Day 90- All business 21 - Monday

Monday, February 22, 2010

Calories Consumed: 1194

Workout: NONE

*still feel like absolute ick hopefully tomorrow will be better!

Monday, February 22, 2010

Day 89 - All business 20 - Sunday

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Calories Consumed: 1129

Workout: NONE

*exhausted.  Feel run down... ugh!

Day 88 - All business 19 - Saturday

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Calories Consumed: 1108

              3 minutes warm-up
              42 minutes 
              (3 - 2 minute sprints; 2 - 5 minutes sprints)
               8 minutes cool down

       Strength Training:
                100 reverse crunches
                100 regular crunches

Day 87 - All business 18 - Friday - Weigh-in week #13

Friday, February 19, 2010

Weigh-in  - Down 1.2lbs!!!!  :)

Calories Consumed: 1514

              3 minutes warm-up
             20 minutes 
              8 minutes cool down

       Strength Training:
              60 back rows (resistance bands)
              60 pulsed back rows (resistance bands)
              60 biceps curls (10 lbs each hand)
              60 triceps curls (10 lbs each hand)
              60 shoulder press (10 lbs each hand)
              60 chest flies (10 lbs each hand)

Day 86 - All business 17 - Thursday

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Calories Consumed: 1353

       Cardio: NONE (formally)
                    -- 3 hours of light dancing in rehearsal...

       Strength Training:
                 50 push ups
               100 reverse crunches
               100 regular crunches

Day 85 - All business 16 - Wednesday

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Calories Consumed: 1092

Workout: NONE

Day 84 - All business 15 - Tuesday

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Calories Consumed: 1235

            3 minutes warm-up
            46 minutes 
            (2 - 5 minutes sprints)
             8 minutes cool down

       Strength Training:
             100 reverse crunches
             100 regular crunches

Day 83 - All business 14 - Monday

Monday, February 15, 2010

Calories Consumed:  1137

Workout: Slim in 6 - Burn it up!!!! (59 minutes of total body workout!!)

Day 82 - All business 13 - Sunday

Sunday, February 14, 2010


Calories Consumed: 1320 (approximately)

             3 minutes warm-up
             42 minutes
              8 minutes cool down

Day 81 - All business 12 - Saturday

Saturday, February 13, 2010

Calories Consumed: 1237

Workout: NONE

Day 80 - All business 11 - Friday - Weigh-in week #12

Friday, February 12, 2010

Weigh-in -- back up the .4 lbs. :( (bloated like crazy!)

Calories Consumed: 917

Workout: Jillian Michael's 20 minutes workout - 30 day shred-

*TOTALLY PMSing!!!  ouch!

Day 79 - All business 10 - Thursday

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Calories Consumed: 1212

Workout: NONE

*Avatar - movie

Day 78 - All business 9 - Wednesday

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Calories Consumed:  1137

            3 minutes warm-up
            41 minutes 
             8 minutes cool down

       Strength Training:
              150 regular crunches
              150 reverse crunches

Day 77 - All business 8 - Tuesday

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Calories Consumed:  1044

            10 minutes

       Strength Training:
             50 back rows (resistance bands)
             50 pulsed back rows (resistance bands)
             50 biceps curls (12 lbs each hand)
             50 triceps curls (12 lbs each hand)
             50 shoulder press (12 lbs each hand)
             50 chest flies (12 lbs each hand)
             2.5 minutes of lunges

Day 76 - All business 7 - Monday

Monday, February 8, 2010

Calories Consumed: 941

            3 minutes warm-up
            44 minutes 
            8 minutes cool down

       Strength Training:
            1 set of Pilates 100
            100 reverse crunches
            100 regular crunches

*temp job at Lake Point Tower - 1 week, day 1

Day 77 - All business 6 - Sunday

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Calories Consumed: 1048

Workout: NONE


Day 76 - All business 5 - Saturday

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Calories consumed: 1038

Workout: NONE


Day 75 - All business 4 - Friday - Weigh in week #11

Friday, February 5, 2010

Weigh-in = down .4 lbs!  Yay a loss!

Calories consumed:  920

Workout: NONE


Day 74 - All business 3 - Thursday

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Calories Consumed:  1105

            3 minutes warm-up
            43 minutes 
            8 minutes cool down

       Strength Training:
             1 set of Pilates 100
             100 reverse crunches
             100 regular crunches

Day 73 - All business 2 - Wednesday

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Calories consumed: 1108

Workout:  NONE

Day 72 - All Business 1 - Tuesday

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Calories Consumed: 1191

            3 minutes warm-up
            52 minutes
            (1 - 10 minute sprint)
             8 minutes cool down

       Strength Training:
             50 back rows (resistance bands)
             50 pulsed back rows (resistance bands)
             50 biceps curls (12 lbs each hand)
             50 triceps curls (12 lbs each hand)
             50 chest flies (12 lbs each hand)
             50 shoulder press (12 lbs each hand)

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Oh my goodness I am so way behind I can't stand it!!!

I cannot believe how long it's been since I actually posted anything!

Life just took over and knocked me in the crazy zone.

HOWEVER:  I have not fallen off the wagon or fallen in a well or anything.  I have been keeping track of my workouts and my calories on paper and fully plan to post these things ASAP.

It just seems...daunting!  I'm exhausted every time I even THINK about doing this blog because I'm so way way behind.

BUT:  I came up with a solution.  Nothing is going to get better unless I work through it.

So for the sake of time and interest, I thought back to the reason I began posting here to begin with:  I wanted a place that would keep me accountable to myself.

So, the most important thing to post, for the moment, is what I did that day.  The emotions are sort of fleeting but still important, but I don't necessarily remember what was bugging me that day unless I address it that day.

I will be doing a flurry of daily posts to just "get those crazy days" out of the way.  I will be reflecting on things as they continue to play an emotional/recurring role in my head/in my life in future posts, for sure.  It is decidedly true that there is no way I would be succeeding this much if I wasn't putting my feelings/thoughts down on "paper".  I require that reflection.  It keeps my brain going in the right place AND it helps me acknowledge my successes (as well as my failures or...struggles).

Look for my crazy flurry of "all business" posts which should be appearing in the next few days.  After those are complete I am planning to jump head-on back into the "real" posts.

Thanks for being so supportive and awesome and reading this insanity that is my journey!


Sunday, February 7, 2010

Day 71 - Coffee Talk and Ab Realities

Monday, February 1, 2010

So today was nice and somewhat uneventful.

I met with a friend for coffee.  I was a bit worried about seeing her.  We had a big miscommunication recently.  I was hoping things would smooth over at this gathering.

It did.  We had fun and a few laughs.

The biggest issue is how even though I'm not working full-time right now I'm so freaking busy.  It seems confusing to people who know me when I say I'm not available.  They cannot understand what could really be filling up my time.

Trust me.  There is a LOT.  But I will save that for another blog entry. :)

Suffice it to say I am very happy things went well with this friend, and I am hoping things go just as well with Lisa tomorrow evening.  Although, we may not be meeting because she caught this horrible pneumonia/bronchitis/cold-flu thing and may not even be at work tomorrow.  :(  Sickness sucks.

Jumped back on the workout wagon again today.  Went well and I felt good with that.

I read through Jillian Michael's Making the Cut and discovered that I need to change my ab routine a bit.  Lately, I've noticed that my obliques are getting nice and taught, but I feel like I'm "expanding" or getting wider.  According to Jillian, the obliques can DO that, especially if you have fat on top of the muscle (which I still do, stupid fat). Therefore, I'm not really doing myself much good widening if I'm trying to shrink.  So I'm changing up my ab routine.  Only regular crunches and reverse crunches.  Less or no obliques.  We'll see how this goes!

Today's Goal: re-read a bit of Making the Cut - Jillian Michael's book for ideas = SUCCESS!

Tomorrow's Goal: Workout during the Biggest Loser #9!  Woo hoo!

Calories Consumed: 1272

           3 minutes warm-up
          42 minutes jog/run
           (1- 10 minute sprint)
           8 minutes cool-down

     Strength Training:
           100 reverse crunches
           100 regular crunches

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Day 70 - 'Fessing up and Video workouts

Sunday, January 31, 2010

So today I have no idea what I really did.  See, lately I've been horribly slack on updating this blog.  I write notes about what I'm going to blog about (ex: I know what weights/cardio I did every day), but the days just smear into the next.

Technically, it's Thursday night.

And I'm writing about last Sunday.


So...honestly, I'm not sure what happened.  I believe I spent most of the day at home working on postcards for the voiceover stuff.

It was a fairly uneventful day.  Really.

However, I realized that if I decide to workout to a workout video, I'm better off doing it when Jon is around.  My mind starts to wander when there's no "accountability" and while I'll still DO the workout when I'm alone, I'm busy thinking about things. I get unfocused.

While I don't LIKE working out with Jon around it does keep my head in the game, a little.

Today I revisited Slim in 6 - Ramp it Up.

It was a good workout.  I was proud of the fact when they recommend doing the push-ups I was able--nay, determined-- to do them on my toes.  Considering I was doing 100 pushups a day for a while, ON MY TOES, two sets of 15 push-ups shouldn't be too hard.

I'm desperately trying to catch up on this blog so I can be back on my game.  Bear with me :)


Today's Goal: watch my eating. Calories are getting slightly erratic = SORT OF SUCCESS? (I guess that's not something I can really watch on one day?)

Tomorrow's Goal: re-read a bit of Making the Cut - Jillian Michael's book for ideas

Calories Consumed: 1040

       Slim in 6 - Ramp it Up (total body workout with resistance bands)
       47 minutes

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Day 69 - Crazy cleaning and (almost) Running into my Ex

Saturday, January 30, 2010

So today was an interesting day.

Interesting = frustrating, productive, stressful, and surprising.

Jon and I had the day planned out:

I wanted to workout
We had to go to Best Buy
We had to go to Walgreens or a grocery store
We had to clean the kitchen and the kitchen floor

For some reason we were both really on edge today.  We usually work these things out but for some reason we were just on each other's last nerve.

That caused some major tension with some out-and-out fighting.

I HATE fighting and I sincerely hate fighting with Jon.  It makes me feel sad and confused and all my stupid childhood fears come crashing down on me.  It takes me a while to regroup and come back from those kinds of fights.

I'm sure it stems from never feeling like my side was heard in my family.  I spent so many fights at home trying to be heard.  It's very difficult.  And when Dad fights, he fights dirty.  He says something hurtful and surgical to shut it down so he can "win".  My Mom has a tendency to do the same thing, but she also just shuts down completely.  And she listens when my father is yelling at her to "hang up the phone" or whatever.

We definitely come from a family of fighters.

I end up feeling deflated and sad and just a big ball of ickiness.

Jon likes to stay in and fight.  Sometimes I can't handle it.  I can't think straight.  My emotions get in the way of my thoughts and take over.  I try to take a break so I can process but he doesn't always want to give that.

It can get messy.

However, after a long time in the car in the parking lot (isn't it always like that?  Why is shopping so damned stressful?).  We finally started to feel better and decided to finish our shopping at the grocery store near our house.


One of the most frustrating things about living in this city is how big and small it is.  I have tried to avoid the Jewel grocery store near our house for a variety of reasons the last 3.5 years.

1. It's a smaller store so the selection isn't always great
2. the aisles are narrower and it's a more frustrating shopping experience
3. My ex shops there.

Yeah, really #3 is the top reason I like to avoid the grocery store.  Although I hadn't ever run into him there.  Until today.

To be honest, I didn't actually run into him.  I saw him.  I really don't think he saw me.  It was kinda freaky.  I also saw his girlfriend (she seems like a nice person and seems to care about him which is nice for him).  She looks like a thinner version of me with smaller boobs.  He has a type.

Sigh.  It's not a big deal. Or it shouldn't be.  But I really wish my ex and Jon's ex would just let it go, already and just agree to bury the hatchet.

Do any of these bad feelings help any of us?

Well, once that awkwardness happened Jon was my lifeline and we made jokes and laughed about how icky and weird it was.  I'm grateful for his understanding my conflicted feelings about that whole thing.  He's a pretty great guy.  I'm pretty damned lucky. :)

After working out and dinner, we hit the ground running on that kitchen.

It's in fabulous shape!  Go Jon. You rocked it!

Today's Goal: try to do full cardio and light abs if I can = SUCCESS!

Tomorrow's Goal: watch my eating. Calories are getting slightly erratic

Calories Consumed: 958

            3 minutes warm-up
            47 minutes jog/run
            8 minutes stretch/cool-down

     Strength Training:
           25 push ups
           50 reverse crunches
           50 regular crunches
           50 alternating toe touches (on my back)

Sunday, January 31, 2010

Day 68 - Weigh-in week #10 and Taking it slow

Friday, January 29, 2010

So today was a weigh-in day!  AND, I was coming off of feeling like complete crap so I wasn't sure what the heck I would find on the scale.  I had been away from any workout for 2 days.  This was not a great thing.  Plus, the last weigh-in had happened on last Saturday giving me only 6 days to lose instead of 7.  But, on to the scale I went.

I LOST 1.8 lbs!!!  WOOO HOOO!!!!!

That was a great way to start the day.  Let me tell you!

To date I have now lost 8.6 lbs!

I really hope this continues!  I am really trying to keep this thing going.  I love the changes and how much stronger I am and how much stronger I feel!

Today I really took it easy and didn't do too much.  I worked out for a short amount of time and got a little nauseated while doing it.  I guess I need to be careful I don't relapse.  It's just so hard when I see such a great number on the scale!  It makes me want to kick it into high gear.

I know, I gotta listen to my body.

Jon and I have a HUGE to-do list we are trying to get to this weekend.  I hope we can tackle most of it tomorrow so we have a quieter Sunday.

I'm bummed because I don't film this weekend like it had originally been planned.  Locations had to be revamped and that, of course, revamped the schedule.

Oh well.  I'm on next weekend so I have to stay healthy.

Yay for good scale days!

Today's Goal: Take it easy = moderate Success (I did work out but kept it light and easy...)

Tomorrow's Goal: try to do full cardio and light abs if I can

Calories Consumed: 1098

           3 minutes warm up
           30 minutes jog/run
          (1 - 10 minute sprint)
            5 minute cool-down

Day 67 - Thwarted and Thwarted

Thursday, January 28, 2010

So today everything I had planned got thwarted.

My day was planned like this:

1. get up and workout
2. shower
3. pick up mom
4. go to my boob-squish (mammogram)
5. put on deodorant (you can't wear it until after you get your test)
6. work with mom on wedding stuff
7. meet up with Lisa to sort stuff out
8. come home and have dinner with Jon
9. get a good night's sleep

Here is how my day went:

1. got a HORRIBLE night's sleep
2. freeze and feel achy
3. wake up at 6am realizing I feel like crap
4. put on extra socks because I'm so cold
5. wake up at 6:05am realizing I really feel like crap
6. decide at 6:15am to finally bite the bullet and check the thermometer
7. coming to terms with the fact that I had a fever of 100.3 (this is actually high-ish for me since my normal body temp is 97.5-ish usually)
8. decide I have to cancel everything today and just sleep
9. call and reschedule boob-squish, Mom, and Lisa
10. Sleep on and off and finally break my fever

I began to feel better as the day wore on when my fever finally broke.  I have no idea why I had the fever or where it came from but I felt awful all night long.

So no workout for me today.  Guess that's a two-in-a-row for not working out.  Not my favorite trend but I'll deal with it.

There's always tomorrow...

Today's Goal: Get back to the routine = FAIL (yeah, fever thwarted that.  Stupid fever)

Tomorrow's Goal: Take it easy and don't push myself

Calories Consumed: 892

Workout = NONE

Saturday, January 30, 2010

Day 66 - Run-down and Voiceover Promotion

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

So today I felt like crap.  I felt run-down and just ick.  I tried to get motivated to get up and get going and I just didn't have it in me.

Guess I am taking today as a recovery day.  I hate when my body tells me when it needs stuff.  I mean, I'm glad it does, but I wish it and my mind would be on the same schedule.

Anyhow, it wasn't too much of an issue since I had a real goal in mind: Send out round 1 of my voiceover promotion postcards.

It's such a crazy/different type of promoting.  The marketing on this side of the business is nothing like the other side.

I know once I get into it and get my groove it will get easier.  It just feels like craziness while I'm trying to get it done the first time.  The learning curve is HUGE.  I just have to accept that I don't "get" it yet and know the next time or the next next time will come easier.

I did complete it, though, so I know that it was important to get on that train and see it through this week.

Now.  Most importantly, I need to realize that it is just as important for me to schedule time to work on THIS as it is to work on my business with my sister-in-law, Carrie, as it is to schedule time to meet with my  mom to plan/work on the wedding.  Whew!  I am surprised there are enough hours in the day/in the week to get everything done!!

That's always been my issue.  I never feel like I'm getting enough done.

I look at my apartment and sigh dreadfully that there is SO MUCH I could do to make it more habitable and feel less cluttered and organized and BLECH.  I feel overwhelmed by everything we have to do every single day/week: Dishes, cleaning the bathroom, vacuuming, laundry, cleaning the mammal's cages, dusting, changing the sheets, grocery shopping, etc, etc, etc.  It all becomes WAY too much after a while.  When does one get to take a break?  And will I ever get a break where I feel like I'm done?  Where everything really is in its place?

I might have to start triaging my life like I triaged my career.  I decided to focus on film and voiceover for the moment.  I'm not auditioning for live theatre, (although I've recently been handed two separate opportunities that I'm, of course, not turning down), and I'm really making sure my focus has my attention.  I think I need to do that in my apartment.  I need to tackle one project at a time and just realize that it's got to be completed before I'm allowed to tackle the next one.

For example:  My photos.  Oy vey!  I have so many and I want to scan them so I don't risk ever losing them.  BUT, I also have to go through them.  I have two boxes (bigger than shoe boxes) FULL of photos as well as many photo albums.  This project will take quite a while to get through.

Then there are the cross-stitching projects I've started and never completed.  They live in my closet and I miss working on them.  I love to cross-stitch.
Same thing with knitting.  I have a 1/2 completed  project I'm trying to finish for my best friend.  UGH.

Ok. I guess I need to write a real list of all the projects I plan/need to complete in order to really get a clue as to which to tackle and when.

This could take years. :)  Sigh.  But if I really give myself a goal to work on these things, maybe I can actually get them done.  I'd be happy giving myself an hour a week as long as I'm DOING something. Even if they take a long time, it's better than not working on them at all.  At least I can say I'm making SOME progress, right?

First up:  My best friend's gift. I was hoping to complete it by her birthday which was in January. If I can complete that by MY birthday (it's the taint of March...March 16th. --- taint the Ides, taint St. Patrick's Day--) then I can send her a holiday/birthday gift on my birthday and that would be sort of like getting it on-time. ;)

Ok.  Going to bed and going to wake up strong.

Today's Goal: Postcards. No excuses. = SUCCESS!

Tomorrow's Goal: Get back to the routine

Calories Consumed: 913

Workout - NONE

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Day 65 - Coffee date and Keeping my heart open

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

So today I had a rather busy day.  I ran up to the suburbs to see my sister-in-law and work on our new business together.  (I'll update more on this when we are fully up and running.  Right now I'm slightly tight-lipped until we fully launch).

We had a really great conversation about money and children.  It's so nice how much closer she and I are getting.  She is the one person who lives the closest who is in my wedding party!  I fear she will have the burden on her for lots of work!  Poor Carrie! ;)

After that meeting, I headed back into the city to meet my dear friend Bethany for coffee.  We have been trying to hook up once a month to reconnect when possible.  There's this one Starbuck's near where she works so we tend to meet up there and just talk and catch up.  It's really nice to see her.

On my way, I got a phone call from Grant, the lead in the Fall Away film I'm in.  We had a great conversation where I gave him some advice about "keeping your heart open and ready".  It's something I usually believe strongly in, but sometimes have a hard time putting into practice.  The whole "live as if" attitude is sometimes really hard, but necessary.  In his case, he has a case of the lonely-hearted.  He wants a relationship.  I told him as long as he is keeping his heart open and his life available for that he will find it. I really hope that's true.  He deserves happiness.  He's such a special person!

I got home just in time for The Biggest Loser!  I did my workout watching it and Jon made dinner.  Epic Success!


All in all, a good day.  Lisa and I are meeting on Thursday evening.  Interestingly enough, I'm feeling less stressed about it.  I feel like we just got caught up in whatever and just need a reconnection.  I'm hoping I'm right.  I really miss her and just want to spend some time hanging out with her.  I hope she feels the same way.

Today's Goal: Workout during The Biggest Loser = SUCCESS

Tomorrow's Goal: Postcards. No excuses.

Calories Consumed: 927

              3 minutes warm-up
             45 minutes jog/run
             (1 - 10 minute sprint; 1 - 5 minute sprint)

        Strength Training:
             25 push ups
             50 back rows (using resistance bands)
             50 pulsed back rows (using resistance bands)
             50 biceps curls (12 lbs each hand)
             50 triceps curls (12 lbs each hand)
             50 chest flies (12 lbs each hand)
             50 shoulder press (12 lbs each hand)

Day 64 - Pants in the closet and The Defiled screening

Monday, January 25, 2010

So today is the sneak peek screening for the film The Defiled!!!  I played a very small role in this feature/horror/awesome film!

I'm very excited to see the full film on-screen!  We are seeing it in a real screening room at Columbia College in Chicago.  My parents, Jon and I will be having dinner at my folks house and then heading over to the college.

I wasn't sure what I was going to wear.  I had some ideas (I wanted to dress up a bit), but nothing was set in stone.  I was a TOTAL GIRL.  I tried everything on in my closet.  Nothing was working.

The one wonderful thing about losing weight and changing how your body looks is everything gets big on you and you feel great in smaller sizes.  The one frustrating thing about losing weight is that everything is big on you that you have IN YOUR CLOSET and then you have to go out and get more clothes.

Deep in the back of my closet I have a pair of pants.

I bought these pants and the sweater at H&M circa 2002.

I never wore the pants.  By the time I had a reason to wear them I'd gained about 5 pounds and they didn't fit well anymore.

So they went into the back of the closet with the tags on.

I've gotten rid of a LOT of clothes ranging in sizes for the last few years.  For some reason, there were a few things I just wouldn't part with.

These pants were one of those items.  I was just SURE I would get in them again and be able to really wear them to something.

I'm proud to say...TODAY WAS THAT DAY!

I should have gotten a picture of me in them.  But regardless, I really enjoyed that amazing feeling of zipping them up and having them FIT!

Mom made dinner and we ran off to watch me get mutilated!

The screening was a BLAST!  I had such an amazing time!  There's nothing cooler than seeing your face on a movie screen.  Seriously.  It was awesome!

Onwards and upwards!  I'm hoping we'll have as awesome a screening of Fall Away when it's finally complete!

Check out the poster for The Defiled! My name's on it!!!!!

Today's Goal: Be careful at Mom's for dinner = SUCCESS

Tomorrow's Goal: workout during The Biggest Loser 9

Calories Consumed: 1100

             3 minutes warm up
             30 minutes jog/run
            (1 - 5 minute sprint)
             8 minutes cool down/stretch

      Strength Training:
             30 push ups
             1 Pilates 100
            50 bicycle
            50 reverse crunches
            50 regular crunches

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Day 63 - Grey's Anatomy and Proud of me

Sunday, January 24, 2010

So today I dove back into the workout with a vengeance.

Normally, when Jon is home and I'm working out, we throw West Wing on.  I love having TV shows on DVD because they are the perfect time to do a cardio workout!  42ish minutes.

Today, though, Jon was sleeping a bit late (he's allowed), so I decided to pop in my newest TV show, Grey's Anatomy.

Ok.  I resisted watching this show.  FULLY resisted.  It sounded kinda dumb, no offense.  But, honestly, I've truly fallen for it.  It's funny and fun and it gets me through my cardio.
*I'm only on episode 4 season 1 so please, no spoilers! ;)

Other than that, Jon and I went to go see my friend and former teacher, Scott's, show at Act One.  He directed a one-act by Horton Foote called Laura Dennis.  It was performed by the first year students (it's a 2 year conservatory).  They are half-way through their first year.  I thought they did a very nice job, considering.  There is some real talent there.  Others have some work to do, but they are really on the right track.  It's lovely to see that. :)

Food shopping and dinner rounded out the night.  We were tired but not sleepy.

I am still feeling a bit stressed and sad about my communication problems with Lisa.  I hope we get a chance to see each other and resolve this.  She's one of my best friends and one of my maids of honor for my wedding.  It would be a shame if this causes us any more grief.  However, I realize I am seeing things differently than I used to.  I'm happy about my life changes, but I do realize that often it's weird for people who have known me for a while, (especially through the really bad times) to see a change in me.  I mean, I am not only changing from the outside, I'm changing on the inside.  Cheesy-sounding, I know, but I'm really happy with who I'm becoming.  And I'm really proud.

When I was at Act One, I realized how frustrated I was all the time.  I was sad and angry and anxious.  I was never content with myself.  I thought the world was against me and I had limited time to reach my goals or I would be a failure.  I saw myself as the one with the most experience and the oldest and it scared me how shameful I felt being back in school.  I thought there was something wrong with me.

I don't feel that way anymore.  I made some big decisions upon leaving school and it's never too late to change your life, I feel.  So, here I am.  I'm changing it.  And I feel great about my choices.  It's always a journey and a process.

Today's Goal: Back on the workout track!

Tomorrow's Goal: be careful eating at Mom's for dinner

Calories Consumed: 1090

           42 minutes
          (1 - 10 minute sprint; 5- 1 minute skaters)
           8 minutes cool-down/stretch

      Strength Training:
           30 push-ups
           50 back rows (15 lbs each hand)
           50 biceps curls (12 lbs each hand)
           50 triceps curls (12 lbs each hand)
           50 chest flies (12 lbs each hand)
           50 shoulder press (12 lbs each hand)

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Day 62 - Weigh-in week #9 and Adventures

Saturday, January 23, 2010

So today Jon and I took a drive out to Wisconsin!  Our plan was to go to my dear friend, Debbie's, baby shower and then head over to see one of my best friends, Lisa, who lives in Kenosha.

Debbie lives in Neenah, Wisconsin which is about 3.5 hours one way from Chicago.  We had the whole day planned.

Get up and get out by 9:00AM.

Get to Debbie's by 1:30PM (when the shower starts)

Hang there for awhile (I haven't seen her much and definitely not since she's gotten pregnant)

Then head back towards Kenosha and see Lisa, her family, and her boyfriend Ryan at the bowling alley.

The day started great.  We were a little late (about 20 minutes) but nothing awful.  Debbie was thrilled to see us.  Then when everyone started to get going we decided to hang out for a while.

We planned to chat with them and then head out to see Lisa who just told us to let her know when we were in the 'hood.

We sort of cut our conversation short to ensure we'd make it to Kenosha at a decent hour when we texted her.  Unfortunately we weren't able to make that meeting happen.  For reasons I don't quite understand...

Why am I mentioning all this?

Well, I wanted to say that I handled something that was really upsetting in a different way than my normal way.

I used to get upset and then stuff down my emotional response to it.  Usually I felt like I looked weak or too vulnerable to visibly show I am hurt by something.  Easier to get angry about it, right?

While driving, I made it a point to take a breath and realize, and verbalize that I am very sad about this situation.  I really was disappointed and I really wanted to see my friend and I was hurt that it was not able to happen.

I expressed those sad feelings.  I did, also, express my angry and frustrated feelings.  But the fact that I acknowledged my hurt ones is a big step for me.

I'm proud of that.

Maybe this over-haul on me is working...

I realized this morning that I completely forgot to do a weigh-in yesterday!  All the filming excitement got to me!

So!  Here are the results:  Back down those 4 ounces I gained!  YAY!

Weight-loss to date: 6.8 lbs!  Yay!

Today's Goal: be careful with my choices at the shower!  And if we get drinks with Lisa = SUCCESS! (I did have a bite of the awesome cake but it was totally budgeted in the calories. And, well, we never even saw Lisa to have drinks...)

Tomorrow's Goal: Back on the workout track!

Calories Consumed: 1053

Workout: NONE = recovery

Day 61 - Filming and Futurama references

Friday, January 22, 2010

So today I had to get myself ready for filming.  I am so excited to get back on set!  I absolutely love that this is the work I am getting to do now.  I love the film I love the crew I love the director I love the cast!

I. Love. It. All.

So, I wanted to make sure I was worked out before our 12 hour filming.

So there I was.  Ready to workout.  And I just didn't want to do it.

Now, of course, I really don't like working out, anyway.  (Who does, usually?)

So I took a moment to analyze and figure out what it was about this workout that was bothering me.

Was it that I didn't want to work out because I was too tired?  No.

Was it that I felt sore?  No.

Was I just "not feeling it"?  No.

I actually wanted to workout, but I just didn't want to do my regular routine.

As Jon and I often like to quote (and misquote) Futurama I realized what the problem was.

This workout was "boring me, Zoidberg"

Ok!  This is fixable.  I have a plethora of other workout videos and things to do to alleviate the boredom.

So today I opted to do a total body workout which included cardio, resistance bands, abs, yoga, etc in less than 48 minutes!  Yay me.

Why don't I do these all the time?  Aha!  Well, I get bored with them too, Zoidberg.

But it was a nice change from the regular routine.

Also, I'd like to add that in the past I've done this workout and never felt as strong as I do now doing it.  I often had to bow out of a rep or two or even an exercise when it would get too difficult.  It was incredibly cool to be able to do the entire work out and feel good!

I'm sure I'll be revisiting that one again!  :)

Filming?  Oh filming was amazing!  A.M.A.Z.I.N.G!

I got wrapped at 3:30AM.  Gotta get up at 8:00AM to head to Wisconsin (3.5 hours one way) to visit my dear friend from high school, Debbie, for her baby shower!!!  Cannot wait to see her!  Then, I get to hang with one of my best friends, Lisa, who moved back home to Kenosha, Wisconsin after that!  So excited to see them!  It's been too long in both cases.  I'm missing my ladies!

Today's Goal: Do a total body workout (weights and/or abs with cardio) = SUCCESS!

Tomorrow's Goal: be careful with my choices at the shower!  And if we get drinks with Lisa

Calories Consumed: 1054

      Slim in 6 - Ramp it up - less than 48 minutes

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Day 60 - Sloth and Kicking My Own Ass

Thursday, January 21, 2010

So today I had a realization.

I need alone time.  And I need time where I don't feel "under the gun", so to speak.

When I schedule a recovery day I really need to remember that it can include doing nothing.

I suck at doing nothing.

I suck hard at it.

I grew up believing the only way to succeed was always be working towards the goal.  I never stopped to enjoy or even reflect on the journey.

I still struggle with this.

I've often over-scheduled myself and believed I could make up time later.  Yeah, well, sometimes I need those "lazier" days in order to recharge and move on tomorrow with even more commitment and determination.  Sometimes I just want to lie in bed and not have to strategize/think/plan/decide anything. Sometimes I just want to be alone and read a book or watch Law & Order and not feel bad about it.

Sometimes I do this.

Usually I feel guilty.

Often I protest that I have every right to enjoy myself, yet I never do.

Today is no exception.

All day I tried to just talk myself into letting this be a "sloth" day.  I'd use it as a recovery day even though I knew full-well that Saturday made more sense as a recovery day since I'd probably be traveling and in my car most of the day after coming off of a long filming.

But my body just wanted it and, reluctantly, I gave in.

I laid in bed most of the day and just tried to enjoy the fact that I was taking "me" time.

It worked...sort of.  But since I felt like I'd been slacking off on some of my more intense workouts this week, it never really stuck with me, fully.

Jon and I had waited until we both had some time to watch Tuesday's episode of The Biggest Loser.

Jon returned from a meeting and I was all set to watch it with him, at 10:30PM when I realized I felt like a huge hypocrite!

Here I had spent the entire day laying around and I was about to spend ANOTHER 2 hours watching a TV show?  With no exercise?
So, I busted out the exercise clothes and hopped to it watching The Biggest Loser.  It's really motivating and fun to workout while THEY workout.

I got a GREAT cardio workout in and still got to enjoy one of my favorite inspirational shows. :)  Win/Win!

Today's Goal: 60 oz of water = SUCCESS!

Tomorrow's Goal: Do a total body workout (weights and/or abs with cardio)

Calories Consumed: 1042

           3 minutes warm up
           42 minutes jog/run
           (1 - 15 minute sprint!)
           8 minutes cool down/stretch

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Day 59 - Family and Fighting fatigue

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

So today I went to hang out with my sister-in-law Carrie.  She's pretty amazing.  I don't know how she runs the household with 4 boys AND my brother.

I love my brother.  He and I did not get along when we were growing up.  We had completely different interests but as adults we definitely respect each other's accomplishments.

But, this is the first time I've heard my brother tell me how "floored" he was by my talent.

I can't begin to tell you how much that meant to me.  Carrie and I were talking about the film and about the voiceover demos.  She hadn't heard them yet.

I pulled up the website: and she heard the 2 demos.  She was so complimentary!  Then I showed her the photos from the film (Becky I'm totally going to add some photos on here.  I'm just waiting for a day when I have more than a few minutes to really pull some good ones out!)

When I got home and worked out, I got a call from my brother.  This is not usual.  We don't talk on the phone or even text.  But we just know the other has our back, you know?  Anyway, getting a call from him to just tell me how impressed he was and how much he really wants me to succeed just made my entire day!

I was on cloud nine!  :)  Yay for family and for brothers and for sister-in-laws!  Happy!

As far as food and working out, I feel like I did alright today.  Could have done better with strength training but I'm not altogether unhappy with the progress.

I feel as though I'm really fighting fatigue.  I can't seem to get a decent amount of sleep.  I blame the mattress and pillows and everything, but I really wonder if it's something else within me that's just not letting me rest properly.

I'm always stressed about money and work and whatnot, but I really wonder if changing my life is now bringing up crap I didn't realize wasn't worked out.  Or something.

Lots to think about.

Today's Goal: Get some work done with Carrie (my sister-in-law) and get 40 min. cardio = SUCCESS!

Tomorrow's Goal: 60 oz of water, baby!

Calories Consumed: 1048

           3 minutes warm-up
           42 minutes jog/run
          (1 - 10 minute sprint; 3 -1 minute skaters)
            8 minutes cool down/ stretch

     Strength Training:
           60 push ups
           50 regular crunches
           50 reverse crunches
           50 oblique crunches (each side)

Day 58 - Celebration and appreciation

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

So today is my oldest friend, Kathleen's, birthday.  I've known K since I was 9 years old.  We went to a performing arts camp together at the park district and became fast friends.  We then ended up performing in a group called "Traveling Troupe" which performed all over Chicago.  The ages of the performers were 12 - 14.  THEN, we both ended up at Interlochen Arts Academy for high school.

It feels like we've known each other forever.  :)  I'm grateful for that friendship.

She is having a small gathering of people at The Cheesecake Factory this evening.  We are all headed out to celebrate her birthday.

I'm very excited to see her.  She lives in New York but often travels all over for work.  She's a dancer/actress/singer and often gets shows in Florida and Vegas.  She's a busy girl!

My biggest challenge:  making sure I watch my portions and not feeling guilty about the drink(s) I consume.

Cheesecake does offer a fantastic herb-crusted salmon with a huge salad.  I believe I will definitely get that and put the dressing on the side.  Then I'll for sure have leftovers to take home.

I did my workout earlier today.  I had a tough time with cardio.  I just couldn't get my body working. But I got something in, and that's what counts.

Today's Goal: Get that water in = SUCCESS/FAIL (I think I got in about 60 oz but counteracted it with the alcohol...)

Tomorrow's Goal: Get some work done with Carrie (my sister-in-law) and get 40 min. cardio

Calories Consumed: 1132

              3 minutes warm-up
              30 minutes jog/run
             (1 - 5 minute sprint)
              8 minutes cool-down/stretch

        Strength Training:
              50 push ups
             100 regular crunches
             100 reverse crunches
             100 oblique crunches (both sides)

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Day 57 - set-sick and determined

Monday, January 18, 2010

So today I had a shorter day on the set.  I started around 10:00 AM and was released around 3:00 PM.  It was a fun day.  However, upon getting released from the set I got depressed.

I really feel like when I walk on to the set I'm actually "home".  It's such a comforting feeling to be there.  I'm happy and content and don't feel like I'm "working" in any way.  Even though we keep ridiculous hours and I often need an amazing amount of sleep to counteract the time/energy it takes, I'd do it over and over again just to be a part of this incredible experience.

I love this work.  I love that this is my job.  I love saying that I'm a working actor and having something really impressive to show for it.

So leaving I feel "set-sick".  I'm homesick for the work, the people, the art.

To deal with that, I'm back trying to be on-track with my workouts and eating.

Of all the amazing things about being on set, I notice that I drink less water and am not as careful about noting every single calorie I put in my mouth.  While I'm not being an idiot about choices, I'm still grazing more than I'm writing.  It's tough when you are grabbing a quick bite between shots. It's the nature of the game.

But I'm least for a few days.  Hopefully it's enough to start the scale moving down. :)  While I'm very proud of my work, I still have a ways to go before I hit my true goal.

Today's Goal: jump into the full routine = SUCCESS!

Tomorrow's Goal: Keep on that water!

Calories Consumed: 1009

             3 minutes warm-up
             40 minutes jog/run
            (3 - 5 minute sprints)
             8 minutes cool down/stretch

       Strength Training:
            50 push ups
            100 regular crunches
            100 reverse crunches
            100 oblique crunches (each side)

Monday, January 18, 2010

Day 56 - Naps and Crankiness

Sunday, January 17, 2010

So today was another awesome day of filming.  I'm so grateful to be doing this work.  I'm proud of it and very excited to be a part of such an amazing production.

That said: I did better today.  I was able to make a better approximation on my calories.

I was really cranky though.  Sorry Jon!  I definitely took it out on him at first.  I did, however, apologize.  I'm getting better at recognizing when I'm being inflexible and even somewhat belligerent.  I'm getting better at saying "I'm sorry".

I took a nap and got up later and decided I absolutely HAD to do SOME kind of workout.

I settled on watching a West Wing and doing some cardio.  It was something.  Given the schedule of insanity I've been on I really commend myself on getting SOME workout in.  Hopefully if we wrap a bit earlier tomorrow I can get home and get a better workout in.

Today's Goal:  Get more water in = SUCCESS (I doubt I got the entire 80 oz.  But I did drink a lot of water).

Tomorrow's Goal: Try and jump into the full routine if possible

Calories Consumed: 1049

            3 minutes warm-up
            40 minutes jog/run
            8 minutes cool-down/stretch

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Day 55 - Filming and Sleeping

Saturday, January 16, 2010

So today we have a very crazy turn-around time for our filming.  Off the set at 3:00 PM and back on the set at 1:30 AM for hair and make-up.  So exhausted.  Must sleep.

No workout today.  Only sleep.

Better post tomorrow.

Today's Goal: be careful at craft services = SUCCESS (only ate fruit and eggs and veggies)

Tomorrow's Goal: try to get more water in

Calories Consumed: ???  Approx 1200?

Workout: NONE (sleep for a quick turn-over time)

Day 54 - Weigh-in week 8 and Rest

Friday, January 15, 2010

So today was a weigh-in day and a day of rest.  We are on set starting at 2:00 AM this coming morning (Sat.) until 2:00 PM Saturday afternoon.  There will be little time to sleep or rest so I'm going to have to keep my energy up with good food and basically "graze" all weekend.  We film Saturday through Monday afternoon.

As far as the weigh-in goes I did gain.  Only 4 ounces but it's still a gain so that's never fun.  BUT, I'm not throwing in the towel.

I completed a kick-ass workout today and I feel really good about that.

The next few days will be very hard to determine calories since we have craft services providing everything.  But, I will be careful and watch the choices I make.  No candy bars for me.  And lots of tea and coffee.

See you on the next break of filming!  Yay Fall Away!

Today's Goal: Get in some rest and water = SUCCESS!

Tomorrow's Goal: be very careful with my choices at the craft services table

Calories Consumed: Approx. 1200

             3 minutes warm-up
             40 minutes jog/run
            (2 - 5 minute run/invis jump rope sprints; 2 - 1 minute skaters)
              8 minutes cool-down/stretch

     Strength Training:
             100 push ups
              1 session of Pilates 100
             100 regular crunches
             100 regular pulsed crunches
             100 oblique crunches (each side)
             100 regular squats (12 lbs each side)
             100 regular pulsed squats (12 lbs each side)
             100 plie squats (12 lbs each side)
             100 pulsed plie squats (12 lbs each side)

Friday, January 15, 2010

Day 53 - Migraines and Madness

Thursday, January 14, 2010

So today was ick ick ick.  Suffice it to say, I had a migraine.  I still feel awful and I just want to sleep forever!

Short post today.  I did, however, get in some workout.  Trust me, I'm even surprised.  Jon and I got no domestic stuff done, though.  And that's unfortunate.  We have cages and laundry to do. :(  But I was happy just to get rid of the migraine and get in some workout.

I have a not-so-good feeling about this weigh-in tomorrow.  What with my small workouts and extra recovery and caloric overload and cramps this week, I'll be happy with a small gain.  Ugh.

I hate bad weeks.  They feel like they undermine all the work!  Even though I technically DID work out.  More than many!  It's just frustrating.

So, there it is.  Tomorrow may be an ick day just because of the scale. And because of my need to sleep during the day! This weekend proves to be a very busy one with filming.  I will definitely try to get the blog posts up in a timely manner.  But if I'm late-ish I will catch up.

Today's Goal: Do my cardio before Jon gets home from work = FAIL (but I did get my cardio in so that's good...)

Tomorrow's Goal: Get enough sleep and enough water.

Calories Consumed: 1011

             3 minutes warm-up
             30 minutes jog/run
            (6 - 1 minute sprints-skaters)
             5 minutes cool-down

       Strength Training
            50 back rows (15 lbs each hand)
            50 biceps curls (12 lbs each hand)
            50 triceps curls  (12 lbs each hand)
            50 chest flies  (12 lbs each hand)
            50 shoulder press  (12 lbs each hand)

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Day 52 - Cramps and Caloric Overload

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

So today started out AWFUL.  I was up at 3am with horrible cramps.  I finally got back to sleep to wake up with the same pain at about 6am.  It was just one bad dream after another. :(

When I finally peeled myself out of my bed, I realized I had little time to get all my workout done before I had to meet my mom to work on wedding stuff.

I've heard that working out (especially cardio) can help cramps.  So I started some cardio.  It did help.  But I also think popping a few ibuprofen was the "real" help.

After about 30 minutes (yeah that's all I could get) I went to take a shower and realized that somehow the bubble bath popped open on the shelf and had fallen on its side and had dripped bubble goo EVERYWHERE AND ON EVERYTHING.


I quickly called my Mom and told her I'd be running about 30 minutes late.  Then I did a VERY fast clean-up (didn't finish it) and showered and ran out of the house.

Mom and I were looking at places to hold the rehearsal dinner.  We wanted to go a little more light and fun since our wedding is a bit more formal.

We decided to come back to the restaurant and do a tasting that night with Jon and my dad.

After getting back to her apartment we hit the lists and tried to get some things finished.  I was in need of some food.  I had a small snack knowing full-well I would be having calories out of my personal control tonight with the tasting.

UGH!  Food was amazing.  Amazing.  BUT, the calories were ridiculous.  I ate as little as I could and still feel like I was giving a true idea as to what the food would taste like (we got prawns and sea bass and tuna, etc.  I am a pescatarian so I don't eat meat or poultry.  Only fish).

After leaving I just started to feel icky again.  I wanted to take more ibuprofen, but I also needed to get my abs and legs in today.

I don't know how I did it, but I busted out the abs and legs when we got home last night.  No extra cardio, but I did what I could.  I barely combated the calories, though, I'm sure.  Things were DRIPPING in oil.

Ok, ok, I know tomorrow is another day.  And I did do well to avoid all the chocolate my mom has lying around the house.  I wanted a frango mint so badly I could taste the indulgence in my mind.  But I didn't.
So that was good, right?

Today's Goal:  Drink water and be careful at dinner.  FAIL (I know I did the best I could at dinner, but it just was a caloric fest.  And I somehow lost count as to how much water I drank. Although I can tell you it most likely was NOT enough).

Tomorrow's Goal:  Do my cardio before Jon gets home from work.

Calories Consumed: approx 1500??  (seriously!)

            3 minutes warm-up
            30 minutes jog/run
            (1 - 5 minutes sprint)
             5 minutes cool down

      Strength Training:
           50 push-ups
           1 set Pilates 100's
          100 regular crunches
          100 reverse crunches
          100 oblique crunches (both sides)
          100 regular squats (12 lbs each hand)
          100 regular pulsed squats (12 lbs each hand)
          100 plie squats (12 lbs each hand)
          100 plie pulsed squats (12 lbs each hand)