Day 68 - Weigh-in week #10 and Taking it slow

Friday, January 29, 2010

So today was a weigh-in day!  AND, I was coming off of feeling like complete crap so I wasn't sure what the heck I would find on the scale.  I had been away from any workout for 2 days.  This was not a great thing.  Plus, the last weigh-in had happened on last Saturday giving me only 6 days to lose instead of 7.  But, on to the scale I went.

I LOST 1.8 lbs!!!  WOOO HOOO!!!!!

That was a great way to start the day.  Let me tell you!

To date I have now lost 8.6 lbs!

I really hope this continues!  I am really trying to keep this thing going.  I love the changes and how much stronger I am and how much stronger I feel!

Today I really took it easy and didn't do too much.  I worked out for a short amount of time and got a little nauseated while doing it.  I guess I need to be careful I don't relapse.  It's just so hard when I see such a great number on the scale!  It makes me want to kick it into high gear.

I know, I gotta listen to my body.

Jon and I have a HUGE to-do list we are trying to get to this weekend.  I hope we can tackle most of it tomorrow so we have a quieter Sunday.

I'm bummed because I don't film this weekend like it had originally been planned.  Locations had to be revamped and that, of course, revamped the schedule.

Oh well.  I'm on next weekend so I have to stay healthy.

Yay for good scale days!

Today's Goal: Take it easy = moderate Success (I did work out but kept it light and easy...)

Tomorrow's Goal: try to do full cardio and light abs if I can

Calories Consumed: 1098

Workout:
       Cardio:
           3 minutes warm up
           30 minutes jog/run
          (1 - 10 minute sprint)
            5 minute cool-down

Day 66 - Run-down and Voiceover Promotion

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

So today I felt like crap.  I felt run-down and just ick.  I tried to get motivated to get up and get going and I just didn't have it in me.

Guess I am taking today as a recovery day.  I hate when my body tells me when it needs stuff.  I mean, I'm glad it does, but I wish it and my mind would be on the same schedule.

Anyhow, it wasn't too much of an issue since I had a real goal in mind: Send out round 1 of my voiceover promotion postcards.

It's such a crazy/different type of promoting.  The marketing on this side of the business is nothing like the other side.

I know once I get into it and get my groove it will get easier.  It just feels like craziness while I'm trying to get it done the first time.  The learning curve is HUGE.  I just have to accept that I don't "get" it yet and know the next time or the next next time will come easier.

I did complete it, though, so I know that it was important to get on that train and see it through this week.

Now.  Most importantly, I need to realize that it is just as important for me to schedule time to work on THIS as it is to work on my business with my sister-in-law, Carrie, as it is to schedule time to meet with my  mom to plan/work on the wedding.  Whew!  I am surprised there are enough hours in the day/in the week to get everything done!!

That's always been my issue.  I never feel like I'm getting enough done.

I look at my apartment and sigh dreadfully that there is SO MUCH I could do to make it more habitable and feel less cluttered and organized and BLECH.  I feel overwhelmed by everything we have to do every single day/week: Dishes, cleaning the bathroom, vacuuming, laundry, cleaning the mammal's cages, dusting, changing the sheets, grocery shopping, etc, etc, etc.  It all becomes WAY too much after a while.  When does one get to take a break?  And will I ever get a break where I feel like I'm done?  Where everything really is in its place?

I might have to start triaging my life like I triaged my career.  I decided to focus on film and voiceover for the moment.  I'm not auditioning for live theatre, (although I've recently been handed two separate opportunities that I'm, of course, not turning down), and I'm really making sure my focus has my attention.  I think I need to do that in my apartment.  I need to tackle one project at a time and just realize that it's got to be completed before I'm allowed to tackle the next one.

For example:  My photos.  Oy vey!  I have so many and I want to scan them so I don't risk ever losing them.  BUT, I also have to go through them.  I have two boxes (bigger than shoe boxes) FULL of photos as well as many photo albums.  This project will take quite a while to get through.

Then there are the cross-stitching projects I've started and never completed.  They live in my closet and I miss working on them.  I love to cross-stitch.
Same thing with knitting.  I have a 1/2 completed  project I'm trying to finish for my best friend.  UGH.

Ok. I guess I need to write a real list of all the projects I plan/need to complete in order to really get a clue as to which to tackle and when.

This could take years. :)  Sigh.  But if I really give myself a goal to work on these things, maybe I can actually get them done.  I'd be happy giving myself an hour a week as long as I'm DOING something. Even if they take a long time, it's better than not working on them at all.  At least I can say I'm making SOME progress, right?

First up:  My best friend's gift. I was hoping to complete it by her birthday which was in January. If I can complete that by MY birthday (it's the taint of March...March 16th. --- taint the Ides, taint St. Patrick's Day--) then I can send her a holiday/birthday gift on my birthday and that would be sort of like getting it on-time. ;)

Ok.  Going to bed and going to wake up strong.

Today's Goal: Postcards. No excuses. = SUCCESS!

Tomorrow's Goal: Get back to the routine

Calories Consumed: 913

Workout - NONE

Day 62 - Weigh-in week #9 and Adventures

Saturday, January 23, 2010

So today Jon and I took a drive out to Wisconsin!  Our plan was to go to my dear friend, Debbie's, baby shower and then head over to see one of my best friends, Lisa, who lives in Kenosha.

Debbie lives in Neenah, Wisconsin which is about 3.5 hours one way from Chicago.  We had the whole day planned.

Get up and get out by 9:00AM.

Get to Debbie's by 1:30PM (when the shower starts)

Hang there for awhile (I haven't seen her much and definitely not since she's gotten pregnant)

Then head back towards Kenosha and see Lisa, her family, and her boyfriend Ryan at the bowling alley.

The day started great.  We were a little late (about 20 minutes) but nothing awful.  Debbie was thrilled to see us.  Then when everyone started to get going we decided to hang out for a while.

We planned to chat with them and then head out to see Lisa who just told us to let her know when we were in the 'hood.

We sort of cut our conversation short to ensure we'd make it to Kenosha at a decent hour when we texted her.  Unfortunately we weren't able to make that meeting happen.  For reasons I don't quite understand...

Why am I mentioning all this?

Well, I wanted to say that I handled something that was really upsetting in a different way than my normal way.

I used to get upset and then stuff down my emotional response to it.  Usually I felt like I looked weak or too vulnerable to visibly show I am hurt by something.  Easier to get angry about it, right?

While driving, I made it a point to take a breath and realize, and verbalize that I am very sad about this situation.  I really was disappointed and I really wanted to see my friend and I was hurt that it was not able to happen.

I expressed those sad feelings.  I did, also, express my angry and frustrated feelings.  But the fact that I acknowledged my hurt ones is a big step for me.

I'm proud of that.

Maybe this over-haul on me is working...

I realized this morning that I completely forgot to do a weigh-in yesterday!  All the filming excitement got to me!

So!  Here are the results:  Back down those 4 ounces I gained!  YAY!

Weight-loss to date: 6.8 lbs!  Yay!

Today's Goal: be careful with my choices at the shower!  And if we get drinks with Lisa = SUCCESS! (I did have a bite of the awesome cake but it was totally budgeted in the calories. And, well, we never even saw Lisa to have drinks...)

Tomorrow's Goal: Back on the workout track!

Calories Consumed: 1053

Workout: NONE = recovery

Day 55 - Filming and Sleeping

Saturday, January 16, 2010

So today we have a very crazy turn-around time for our filming.  Off the set at 3:00 PM and back on the set at 1:30 AM for hair and make-up.  So exhausted.  Must sleep.

No workout today.  Only sleep.

Better post tomorrow.

Today's Goal: be careful at craft services = SUCCESS (only ate fruit and eggs and veggies)

Tomorrow's Goal: try to get more water in

Calories Consumed: ???  Approx 1200?

Workout: NONE (sleep for a quick turn-over time)

Day 52 - Cramps and Caloric Overload

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

So today started out AWFUL.  I was up at 3am with horrible cramps.  I finally got back to sleep to wake up with the same pain at about 6am.  It was just one bad dream after another. :(

When I finally peeled myself out of my bed, I realized I had little time to get all my workout done before I had to meet my mom to work on wedding stuff.

I've heard that working out (especially cardio) can help cramps.  So I started some cardio.  It did help.  But I also think popping a few ibuprofen was the "real" help.

After about 30 minutes (yeah that's all I could get) I went to take a shower and realized that somehow the bubble bath popped open on the shelf and had fallen on its side and had dripped bubble goo EVERYWHERE AND ON EVERYTHING.

UGH!

I quickly called my Mom and told her I'd be running about 30 minutes late.  Then I did a VERY fast clean-up (didn't finish it) and showered and ran out of the house.

Mom and I were looking at places to hold the rehearsal dinner.  We wanted to go a little more light and fun since our wedding is a bit more formal.

We decided to come back to the restaurant and do a tasting that night with Jon and my dad.

After getting back to her apartment we hit the lists and tried to get some things finished.  I was in need of some food.  I had a small snack knowing full-well I would be having calories out of my personal control tonight with the tasting.

UGH!  Food was amazing.  Amazing.  BUT, the calories were ridiculous.  I ate as little as I could and still feel like I was giving a true idea as to what the food would taste like (we got prawns and sea bass and tuna, etc.  I am a pescatarian so I don't eat meat or poultry.  Only fish).

After leaving I just started to feel icky again.  I wanted to take more ibuprofen, but I also needed to get my abs and legs in today.

I don't know how I did it, but I busted out the abs and legs when we got home last night.  No extra cardio, but I did what I could.  I barely combated the calories, though, I'm sure.  Things were DRIPPING in oil.

Ok, ok, I know tomorrow is another day.  And I did do well to avoid all the chocolate my mom has lying around the house.  I wanted a frango mint so badly I could taste the indulgence in my mind.  But I didn't.
So that was good, right?

Today's Goal:  Drink water and be careful at dinner.  FAIL (I know I did the best I could at dinner, but it just was a caloric fest.  And I somehow lost count as to how much water I drank. Although I can tell you it most likely was NOT enough).

Tomorrow's Goal:  Do my cardio before Jon gets home from work.

Calories Consumed: approx 1500??  (seriously!)

Workout:
       Cardio:
            3 minutes warm-up
            30 minutes jog/run
            (1 - 5 minutes sprint)
             5 minutes cool down

      Strength Training:
           50 push-ups
           1 set Pilates 100's
          100 regular crunches
          100 reverse crunches
          100 oblique crunches (both sides)
          100 regular squats (12 lbs each hand)
          100 regular pulsed squats (12 lbs each hand)
          100 plie squats (12 lbs each hand)
          100 plie pulsed squats (12 lbs each hand)
        

Day 51 - Time and Money

Tuesday, January 13, 2010

So today was a much better day.  I got in a great workout and felt like things were mostly back on track.

I know a lot of my sleep issues are due to the fact that Jon and I have an absolutely hideous mattress.  It was never meant to be our full-time mattress but it's all we have at the moment.

We're saving every penny we can to just get to go on a honeymoon.  Also, I'm really revving up the promoting of my voiceover demos so any extra money I make has been going into that.

* www.aligoodmanvo.com


Throughout my whole life I've never had just one interest.  I've been a jack of all trades, master of none.  I've decided to change that vision.  I want to stop all the desperate attempts to "get" somewhere.  I am just putting my focus into my interests.  In the future I am totally open to them changing but, for now, I have to stop just shooting myself in the foot.

This is why I am heavily focusing on film and voiceover.  I'm not leaving theatre, altogether, but it's not where my interests are lying these days.  For the first time in my life, I'm ok with that.

Time is what I am lacking.  Time and money.  I've been putting off seeing friends and family so I can focus on me and my goals.  It's taken a toll on my mental state.  I miss my friends.  I tend to have hermit-tendencies.  So this week and a bit of next week I made sure to make firm plans with friends and family so I HAVE to get out of the house and schedule myself better.

Now, of course, I'm freaking out about the time I'm spending away from those things I have to do!

Balance.  Right?  BALANCE.

Got to get a bit better on my water.  I only got in about 50 oz today.  It was not enough.

Working on wedding stuff tomorrow with Mom. Would love to really get some things off of THAT list!

Today's Goal: back into the workout routine = SUCCESS!

Tomorrow's Goal: DRINK WATER!  And be careful at dinner.

Calories Consumed: 1095

Workout:
        Cardio:
            3 minutes warm-up
            40 minutes jog/run/shadow box/kicks
           (1 - 10 minute sprint; 2 - 1 minute skaters)
            8 minutes cool-down/stretch

        Strength Training:
            60 back rows (15 lbs each hand)
            50 biceps curls (12 lbs each hand)
            50 triceps curls (12 lbs each hand)
            50 shoulder press (12 lbs each hand)
            50 chest flies (12 lbs each hand)

Day 40 - Weigh-in week 6 and movies

Friday, January 1, 2010

So today is NEW YEARS DAY!  YAY!  We made it to 2010!  :)  This is going to be a great year for me.  I can feel it.  I'm making positive changes in my life all around.  I will be leading a happier and more productive life.  :)  Yay me!

So, the weigh-in.  Surprisingly, I lost 2 oz.  Again!  While I'm THRILLED I actually lost weight considering I thought I might gain, I'm slightly confused as to why the weight is slowing down so much.

I'm thinking about trying an experiment and eating a few extra calories per day.

I wanted to get an idea of how many calories I was expending for my workouts.  In most cases, if I do my jog/run for 45 minutes I'm expending about 370 calories.  And for the weight-lifting I'm probably expending about 140.  So that means about 510 calories, give or take.  So, I need to be eating enough to cause a deficit but still not be in starvation mode, right?

I still have no idea how much I should be eating with the deficit.  I THINK it's about 1200?  Maybe?  Ugh.  I'm only 5'2".  Maybe I DO need to go see a nutritionist to make sure I'm doing everything correctly.  I know the food I'm eating is really good.  It's clean and almost always fresh/homemade.  I almost never eat processed food and I don't eat fast food.  So, all in all, I should be looking great, right?

Anyhow, that's the next step.  I have to try and shake things up a bit.  Maybe my body thinks I'm starving it.  As much as I'm afraid to add calories, I think I need to.  At least for a week and see how it fairs.

Jon and I have been watching movies all day.  He made Hopping John and collards.  MMMMM!  His collards are fantastic.  For those of you who know southern cooking you know, traditionally, Hopping John and collards are made with pork.  I don't eat pork (I'm strangely allergic), so Jon made me a vegetarian version!  He's so wonderful.  And the food was amazing.

You eat these things on New Year's Day.    The Hopping John is for luck and the collards are for money!  I could use both of those things this year!  Go 2010!

After that, we spent the afternoon and evening watching movies and just hanging out together.  A perfect start to the new year!

Today's Goal: Jump back into the workout adding 12 lbs for the upper body = SUCCESS!

Tomorrow's Goal: Focus on getting 1350 calories -

Calories Consumed: 1171

Workout:
        Cardio:
               3 minutes warm up
               47 minutes jog/run/invis jump rope
               (5 - 2 minute sprints)
               8 minutes cool down/stretch

         Strength Training:
              50 back rows (15 lbs each hand)
              50 biceps curls (12 lbs each hand)
              50 triceps curls (12 lbs each hand)
              50 chest flies (12 lbs each hand)
              50 shoulder press (12 lbs each hand)

I did my entire upper body with 12 lbs in each hand!  I rock!  :)

Day 28 - Insomnia and stuck in the middle

Sunday, December 20, 2009

So today we were going with my mom and meeting with the videographer for the wedding. Before that, we were headed to my aunt's house for a "belated" Chanukkah party.

Party was great. I made good food choices and got some nice gifts. :)

The videographer looks like he will do a very nice job for the wedding. He's young, but knows the business very well. I like that.

On the way home I realized that my lack of sleep last night was REALLY catching up with me. I had so much energy yesterday I couldn't fall asleep. I stayed up reading. I finished my book and looked at the clock and it was 5 am! Woah!

So, with the lack of sleep and the late day, I decided to make this day my recovery day. And it's a good thing I did. I ended up falling asleep after Jon made dinner at 6:00! I slept until about 12:30 am, woke up, brushed my teeth and promptly fell back to sleep!

Earlier today Jon and I had a discussion about a friend of ours. I'm really worried about him. He's been making some decisions about his life that are worrisome. While Jon and I are equally concerned, I think, my emotional investment is more, in some ways. I feel guilty or responsible or something and it makes me sad/frustrated/angry. I don't really know how to get a handle on the feelings, lately. I guess it just sucks to watch someone not realize or see the mistakes they are making.

I suppose that's how my best friends felt when I was about to get married to my ex. They were silently screaming at me to see what they could clearly see. Actually, one of them was loud and clear and finally just had to walk away since she couldn't sit and watch me destroy myself (and my ex was quite a phenomenal asshole to her so it would have been detrimental for her to hang out with him, too).

Luckily for me after he was out of the picture, she and I reconciled. As horrible as it was to lose her, I realize why she had to do what she did. And I will ALWAYS be grateful for her being honest with me about why.

I am a coward. I should take a tip from my best friend and talk to this guy. But I feel like he's so down and out right now that the conversation would just add to the "badness". I don't see a good way to talk about this without it coming off crappy and preachy. Yet, I don't see a way to cut off from him without consequences.

I don't want to have to walk away.

I'm stuck in the middle of my emotional feelings about this one. It feels like I'm enabling if I physically help and it feels like I'm abandoning if I don't. I'm trying to, once again, find the balance of supporting without enabling. It's a really fine line! I kinda suck at it, actually. And, today, I pretty much fell apart in tears about the whole thing. I guess I can just encourage the good and discourage the bad and wait until he sees the situation for what it is, not what he thinks/hopes it is. And, honestly, I don't believe anything I could say WOULD make a difference.

It still sucks.

But I'm still working to take care of me, and that includes recognizing my successes as well as my not-so-successes (i.e. failures). I'm human.

Today's Goal: Get my water in - Fail (only got about 50 oz)

Tomorrow's Goal: Do my workout routine

Calories consumed: 959

Workout:

Cardio = None (recovery day)

Strength Training:

50 push-ups (did these earlier in the day)

Day 26 - Weigh-in week 4 and Pizza?

Friday, December 18, 2009

So today I had a weigh-in....

I lost a pound! I was VERY excited for a number of reasons:

1. I had such a frustrating week workout wise - being sick and all

2. Any loss is a reason to celebrate

3. My weight is finally lower than psycho Tracy from Season 8 of The Biggest Loser was at the finale. It's petty but it makes me happy to beat her.

No, but really I am happy. :)

I've lost 5 lbs! That's pretty awesome, actually and I'm really proud of myself. It's not been easy to stick to this plan. Today, for example, there was a pizza party for the employees at the building I'm working at. I was invited. I thought I'd have a small slice of thin crust pizza. I did. Veggie. Then I had a second, just reasoning I would be careful how many calories I would have for dinner. Besides, I wasn't going to give up everything. I have to find that balance.

To be honest, the pizza wasn't that good. It definitely wasn't worth it. I had an awful stomach ache afterwards and felt like ick for the rest of the day.

Plus that was probably 300 calories and for not a lot of food. So, unless it's an epic piece of pizza, I don't need it. Or whatever it is. I mean, there were homemade brownies too! I just had to put my proverbial foot down, there. I just couldn't start with that. Not to say that I won't have a taste of things but I don't need a whole brownie right now.

I have a goal in mind. Eyes on the prize, or whatever.

Anyhow, I'm excited for our last rehearsal for the film, tomorrow, until we start shooting on Jan. 10th!

Today's Goal: Get some stretching in = SUCCESS!

Tomorrow's Goal: Get everything accomplished (workout/errands/laundry)

Calories Consumed: 900

Workout:

Cardio:

3 minutes warm-up

46 minutes jog/run

7 minute cool-down/stretch

Strength Training:

100 push-ups

100 back rows (15 lbs each side)

100 biceps curls (1o lbs each side)

100 triceps curls (1o lbs each side)

100 shoulder press (1o lbs each side)

100 chest flies (1o lbs each side)

Day 25 - Training and a full work-out

Thursday, December 17, 2009

So today I was able to get a full work-out in. Man did that make me HAPPY! This cold sucked ass but it didn't linger like my 3 week flu did earlier this year! That was like evil visited me and had a party in my body. And I didn't have ANY fun.

Anyhow, I think I got most of my water in and I definitely got my vitamin in, yay! I'm slightly nervous about the weigh-in tomorrow, only because I had such a crappy workout schedule this week, being sick and all. But I'm just remembering that it's about balance and doing the best I can with what I've got. In this case, I got a cold. I needed to rest my body. It wasn't in the plans, but that's how it goes.

I started training for the 3 week temp gig I'm doing. The guy who is training me is very nice and really interesting. He's from Poland and is going back to visit family and friends for the holidays. I think the building is going to be fun to work at. Hopefully things will be very quiet. I like quiet.

I'm even more encouraged because they gave me keys to the garage so I can drive every day! Oh joy of joys! I get a parking space and everything. Sweet! I love Chicago, but I really hate the cold. I get cold when the apartment is 79 degrees. I freeze. I sleep in sweatpants and sweatshirts under two very warm blankets.

Cold hands warm heart? Sure, sure. :)

Today's Goal: Get moderate amount of workout in = SUCCESS!

Tomorrow's Goal: do some stretching after workout

Calories Consumed: 1102

Workout:

Cardio:

3 minutes warm-up

46 minutes jog/run

5 minutes cool-down/stretch

Strength Training:

100 regular crunches

100 reverse crunches

100 oblique crunches (each side)

4 rounds of Pilates 100

100 regular squats (1o lbs each side)

100 regular pulsed squats (1o lbs each side)

100 plie squats (1o lbs each side)

100 pulsed plie squats (1o lbs each side)